Amy Moskovitz

Hello, I suffered 3 mild TBIs within a span of less than 2 years. I motor vehicle accident and 2 different physical assaults at work. I would like to share this with you in honor of March being Brain Injury Awareness Month. Thank you.

THE WEIGHT -By Amy Moskovitz
Sometimes something happens that should never have happened.
But it did.
Sometimes multiple things happen that should never have happened.
But they did.
Some things cannot be undone, despite the greatest of efforts.
Words cannot adequately explain how it can literally take seconds for the brain to be altered.
Words can not adequately explain the hoping…the wishing…the wanting…the needing…the yearning…the desperation…to return to the way your mind was before the traumatic event or events took place.
The pain can be easily hidden from the rest of the word if one is adept enough at hiding it.
But it doesn’t go away for the person who has experienced it.
It just doesn’t.
It lingers.
It’s always there.
It can be wished away.
But it is still there.
You can pretend that it isn’t there.
But it still is.
You can try to distract yourself away from remembering how different you feel now.
But you can only distract yourself for so long.
It is like carrying a weight around that you did not ask to carry.
And you get tired of it.
So very tired of it.
But no matter how heavy it is to carry, you have no choice but to carry it.
You just keep on carrying it.
You keep dealing with it.
You just keep dealing with it.
You do your best with what you have.
But what if you don’t want what you have?
What if you don’t want this?
How do you make it go away?
You can’t.
You just can’t.